Monday, March 25, 2013

Stories that bind us

Mummy Ed, a fellow Mummy blogger, shared this link to an interesting New York Times article, The Stories That Bind Us. You can read the full article here.

The article also quoted Jim Collins, author of one of my favourite books, Good to Great:

“Jim Collins, a management expert and author of “Good to Great,” told me that successful human enterprises of any kind, from companies to countries, go out of their way to capture their core identity. In Mr. Collins’s terms, they “preserve core, while stimulating progress.” The same applies to families, he said.”

So in a family unit, traditions should be formed and encouraged. Another quote from the article says this:

“Decades of research have shown that most happy families communicate effectively. But talking doesn’t mean simply “talking through problems,” as important as that is. Talking also means telling a positive story about yourselves. When faced with a challenge, happy families, like happy people, just add a new chapter to their life story that shows them overcoming the hardship. This skill is particularly important for children, whose identity tends to get locked in during adolescence.

The bottom line: if you want a happier family, create, refine and retell the story of your family’s positive moments and your ability to bounce back from the difficult ones. That act alone may increase the odds that your family will thrive for many generations to come.”

In sharing a public blog, I also hope to have the opportunity to  jot down the ups and downs, highs and lows we went through as a family, in the hopes that my kids will have a deeper insight into the lives of their parents (or least Mummy’s point of view, hahaha).

What are some routines we try to establish in our family?

  • Putting up the Christmas tree together.
  • No opening of Christmas presents till the Day itself (with the exception of one present on Christmas Eve, if they stay up late enough. Haha!)
  • Bedtime prayers.

2013-03-06 19.53.22

I am so blessed that from past 2 weeks back, my little almost-two-year-old has taken to babbling simple prayers too. Before he was able to do so, his ever-helpful older brother would cry out “I pray for him!” followed by mimicking a baby-ish voice “Thank you God for a wonderful day. In Jesus’ name. Amen.”

But now that my Xav has found his own voice, literally, I now have to restrain Jay’s enthusiasm, and let Xav have a chance to insist “I pray myself!” followed by mumblings of “bless Daddy, bless Mummy, bless Jayvon, bless Mei Mei, in Jesus’ name…. AMEN!!!!” (And the kids have to make sure their “Amen”s resonates loudly throughout the entire room.)

Hopefully we have a chance to forge more family traditions that are funny, hokey and binding to us all. While I am so not looking forward to my stint in Sydney as a full-time cooking mama (God bless my husband and kids’ stomachs), one thing I am looking forward to it the oodles of time we will be able to spend as a family over there. In my hubby’s own words, we’d both probably not have as much freed-up time till we both get to retirement age. Haha!

Any special family traditions and narratives you have?

Linking up with Susan this Monday.

1 comment:

Susan Koh said...

For us, it's pre-bedtime when we snuggle together for bedtime stories and a good night hug and kiss. Recently, I taught Sophie how to show concern for the family by asking how is everyone's day when we pick her from the CC. We get to hear what she does in school and she hears what we do in the office.